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Hurt n' Wrong

by James Gilmore

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1.
I used up all my energies Holding on to what’s not worth holding on to And if she's never been worth my time at all How come she got me worshipping the ground she walked along You see she's always aimed higher than the clouds And the ground she left me crawling on Oh babe i'm strong in many ways But not of things pertaining to the heart ‘Cause baby I'm a singer now Now I got a place for what you done, In between the melody and strum I’ve accumulated hurt and wrong And found it rhymes real good into a song I've been broken down to shattered bones, As far as my heart i been looking but i don't know The sun don't come out for us no more, But I’ve only ever knew what a black sky's good for ‘Cause baby I'm a singer now
2.
If I cried would you cry Would you hear the news if I died Am i something you think on from time to time 'Cause you wake me up most nights Your ghost visited me today to make me forget these are better days She appears like a fog in between me and the truth I'd know the flowers died if I could only see through and still I call out Hello, Hello like she'd never done me wrong Hello, Hello like she was just anyone I wore black for the mourning 'Cause I heard it's good for something When you dress to match The darkness that makes its way back from the past and I'd kill to hear you speak with some life still beneath it when my words no longer are bouncing off the ceiling over my bed While i call out And i never got the chance to Introduce my real self to you I think you might've like him better than the first interpretation I had While i call out
3.
I sent a letter to you I hoped it’d make you want to come home I sent a letter then chased the postman all the way back down the road You see I couldn't be sure if i was ready for you to know But when you're alone i hear it's the best approach My shadows these days seem to walk taller than i do If you make nice with your ghosts there's nothing left there to haunt you My blue and blonde blessings my feet tend to find their way to I'm sure I need you and a guitar so I can talk to you If you ever need anyone I’m you'll consider me first I suppose I have less to teach then i do to learn But if you'll try me on, I'll clean myself up like new And I'd dust off a love too good to get used to The loneliest times are when you're not alone at all But when the company you keep you desperately need but don't talk So I'd ask you then would you like to go for a walk ‘Cause our secrets our out now I'm invested in your thoughts The lifestyle we choose began with the floor of slots ‘Til the papers grew thin but its ok ‘cause that's not all there is This can still leave you broke, but it's nothing that could ever be bought I'm a fool I’ll admit, you think i might be wrong, but I'm not
4.
If the watchman calls the darkness in And pulls the shade between the sun and canyon The stars float in among western winds As if they thought our love was too dimly lit If the watchman calls the darkness in And frees the sun from its worldly prisons To light wherever it feels most appropriate And you were shining I saw you shining If the fires burn out on the devils playground The billboards block even the rain from their clouds Its not winter here but you can still fly south But know the cold awaits when you come back around When what fades in the mirror looks like where you started And California falls flow down the horizon I’ve never seen the sun set on the ocean I think I’ll try it I think I could try it Yesterday we were in moab when I blink I think I can still see the red Headed north thru south Dakota where we almost lost hold of our heads Every song sings California when I touched the water I saw clearly why Nothings brighter than the sunshine when over a pacific bed it lies
5.
Black Dimes 05:49
I stood above the ground The same one that'd hold me down When they took my bones Chained me to my hometown When real long was my life And i'd seen the end of some terrible times Seen the exchange for light with black dimes I’d recall the change of hands When no two sides argue theirs on a stand Just a party of those who want the best for all of em For only others you prayed And you married whatever love came your way No one else has a god damn thing to say That day And the days when i took ill The ones i paid to insure will collect the bills All the checks i send you know that they will So they will I’d seen the rapture begin When the church of love is the only one that's left Long stripped away were hate and judgements That had been when those who love to cook will feed those who love to hunt will provide all their meat those who want to repair will take care when you bleed and when you need
6.
the conversation continues behind my back would you have ever told me if i didn't ask I know that it is nothing more than glancing back when you told your friends your secrets did they just laugh i'm sorry but i like to paint with pains that should've never survived i'm sorry but i'm a jealous man under this plastic armor hide it shines like it was the real thing but you see like me it lies you thought it was me that could do better and yet it was only you that tried jealousy can be friendly when you get to know she keeps me company at when you don't come home unwarranted and unwelcome but she stays the night i've learned irrational sadness is the worst kind i'm sorry but i like to drown when my lungs are perfectly dry i'm sorry but i'm a coward weak under this plastic armor hide it shines like it was the real thing but you see like me it lies you thought it was me that could do better but you're the owner of my eyes if I waste your beauty not looking God would surely make me blind
7.
I made it from subcripts to the headline made my way from the blackness into the spotlight would i be the writer or the main role be the one they call a fighter or just that guy on the floor Could i be anyone Could i be anyone Would i be like a president or the ones who make the real difference dressed in the finest rags or the guy that'll take em right off your back would i deliver the good news or think up a clever excuse would i be the jury or just lie to the police another killer on the street Could I be anyone Could I be anyone Would i be the silent no ones ever heard of me or like the girl with such a good song the people broke down the doors at amazon would i be the afraid when no rescue attempt by my country was made though i pledged my allegiance ever since my childhood days
8.
the history it holds with a grip on my throat it'd gladly let me go if only i'd let it till then my eyes fail to see my voice rendered weak the pain gave me everything before it took it all the crystals in the room showed the stars and the moon and i thought how could i even dare believe the hurt was really there 'cause the rivers still would flow and the gardens still would grow regardless if I was inside alone with ghosts its only black without a light my company will do fine she held me when i lost my eyes she held me when i was compromised the time for faculty expired my chance to run had left me tired but I was a fool to have cried with eyes that were blind 'cause the ignorant will know the strong all had broken bones regardless if i didn't know while inside alone with ghosts the water raced under the bridge I'd never know what to make of it she's broke so take her in is what they said now we're broken but i'm so glad that i did the days held the hours just the same and the fates and destinies all still became although I couldn't see from in the shade and inside alone with ghosts i spent the day
9.
Evergreen 06:38
I made a habit out of looking At stars that already died They just seem to shine the brighter Now that the had their time and it's over now The ordinary surrounds like a plague So you wouldn't recognize anyone Under the suit jackets in their office space That are draped on the black chair they lay Sometimes i think you're the only reason i survive Sometimes i think you gotta be the only reason i'm alive I got some dark news from home I never handled these things well at all I was a king that stepped down from his throne To weep when your not supposed to see my tears fall Impossible was the weight to bare From the gold I only held in one hand There was no balance in my scale The wealth wasn't enough to go around in my head Grown evergreen when everything else lost its leaves Sometimes I think that could be all I need

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released October 15, 2012

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James Gilmore Eliot, Maine

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